Here is to The Heart of Relationships

Most of us would agree that nothing is more important to us than the quality of our lives.

What we may not remember are the following two points:

  1. The quality of our lives depends largely on the quality of our relationships.

When relationships with spouses, children, employers, and friends are satisfying, we’re more likely to be happy. When we’re angry or unhappy, something in our relationships has usually gone awry, beginning with ourselves.

2. To a large extent, the quality of our relationships depends on the quality of our communication. We are more likely to be in a satisfying relationship with others when our communication is complete, honest, and skillful.

To sum up: The quality of our lives depends on the quality of our relationships, beginning with looking at the relationship we have with ourselves.

And in turn, the quality of our relationships depends on the quality of our communication. If this is true, we’d be wise to devote attention to improving our communication skills. Although the word communication points to a crucial aspect of our lives, the word is often used in a vague, confusing way.

Communication refers to the practices of speaking and listening. It’s through speaking and listening that we can dramatically affect the quality of our relationships. It is also the non-verbal “speaking” we give through our body language, emotions, gestures and physiology.

Listening also includes paying attention to our inner voice, our higher knowing and that lower voice of internal judgment. What do you say to yourself?

See the payoffs in listening well:

Listening well is one of the best ways to the heart of all relationships.

Listening effectively requires your full presence. This includes your ability to notice what you are noticing. Pay attention to when you are feeling contracted or tense versus when you feel more open and alive. This one tool can be a key to making great shifts in your relationships.

Focusing your attention and being committed to understanding are not always easy. You may not agree with the other person but it is in your ability to see and understand their view that is important.

Listening makes a difference. Effective listening is a valuable business skill.

Listening can also enhance our social lives. Good listeners are valued social companions.

Others feel acknowledged and appreciated when we understand them. Through listening, we learn. Listening carefully can help us discover options and solve a wide variety of challenges. Most importantly spend time listening to your inner-voice, your higher voice will always guide you if you take the time to listen and be present.

Here is to the heart of listening and relationships……